In the midst of all that I am feeling, you know, some general stuff and some not so general stuff which we humans go through at some point or the other, what is happening within me is a surge of happiness to have my desk finally the way I want it. After many years of dithering it took just two days to get it fixed, once the decision was made. This was because I had first toyed with the idea of selling it as it was, and then buying a new desk. This desk was not originally intended for computer work. I had a built-in ironing board fixed into it, at a great expense at that time (many moons ago), which was a drawer that pulled out to reveal an ironing board. The desk had a greater depth then, twenty five inches, more than the standard one of eighteen inches, and its drawer depth was also greater, having to house the collapsible ironing board. The fact is that despite all this hoo-ha, I never used the ‘goddam thingamagig’ (pardon) as an ironing board! So when I got my own computer and needed a desk to place it on, this is what I used for several years. I wanted to change it, it was too wide, but it was working.
The change happened when I bought a new chair, a couple of weeks ago. Yes, that also had a lot of dithering and time pass attached to it. In this case it had to do with the practical aspects of one chair to be lugged all the way from Rani Jhansi road to my place in east Delhi, and the transport stuff always fazes me. Its all in the mind, I have these built-in blocks. But I tightened my girth and did not allow my brain to think too much, and just went and bought it. Pronto, with not too much window shopping and raising of confusion level. It got dismantled and in the car to be easily transported. Nothing to it. Relief. What happened with the chair was that its seat was two inches higher than my previous chair. Don’t ask me about the furniture standards etc. here, that’s something we Indians are not familiar with. What’s a couple of inches here or there in the long run. With the higher seat, my thighs got a bit pressed by the deep drawers of the table, whenever I moved the chair too in. Not very uncomfortable, but still something I could not suffer forever. Change was coming.
Getting back to the table, I had been looking at buying the simple ready made available ones, a dime and dozen kind of computer desks that are available, nothing fancy. I would first need to sell the old desk; then buy a new one. Then I realized that it would be cheaper to get the old one cut (the wood is excellent and expensive), and done to the way I wanted, rather than try selling it with a pull and push ironing board which may be too stylish for the likes of anyone around. The ironing board was removed and packed off to the dungeons (also known as the loft in modern parlance, so the dungeons are now above our heads). The width of the table was reduced, the drawers decreased in depth and viola, it was ready. This happened when the carpenter came to do the kitchen work, and I told him to fix the desk after that.
Even then, a part of me resisted the idea of getting it done! What? Just some left over mental blockages against change.
As they say, the time has to be right for the idea to happen.
I am swimming in freedom now. Alive, kicking happy.
You want to feel this? Just go get something changed, make it more suitable, more comfortable. It may be just a desk.